The Good, The Bad, And the Reality

What a wild six months it has been. 
This is my 9th year in business, and I've learned more in the past 6 months than the other 8.5 years combined.

I'm sitting on the floor of my log cabin in Montana with my laptop and a cup of coffee on my day off, and I'm kind of reeling. It's good to stop and think sometimes, I guess, but it's a powder day, and I can't even muster up the energy to go snowboarding. This isn't like me. It's 2pm, and I'm still in my pajamas. 

I've been going hard for the past few months without stopping. I've been working lots of 15 hour days. It hasn't been easy, but sometimes you gotta hustle hard. It's part of life. Hard work doesn't scare me.

I think back to the time in my life when I freelanced and had no employees, no overhead, no mortgages, no payroll taxes. I snowboarded all day, worked all night. Repeat. I lived in a gross basement apartment with my dog and basically did whatever I wanted with my time, deadlines pending. I ate a lot of Kraft mac and cheese. I had time for a million friends. I was time rich. It was such a different story than my present situation. 

Now, all these years later, not only am I a much-improved cook, but also, I created a full-time job for myself, and I've created jobs for others. In two states nonetheless.

​I would be lying if I said this was easy; it hasn't been easy

Truly great employees are hard to find. I've gotten my ass kicked this year trying to find employees who are a good longterm fit, and it has been expensive. I'm an optimistic person, and I like almost everyone, so I have had to learn to be much slower to hire, to put applicants through the ringer a bit more. And I've learned how to fire. I've worked way too hard on this business for a decade of my life to let it rest in the wrong hands. I have to protect what I've built. I owe it to my truly great employees to protect them too, and I'm getting good at firing people who disrespect our livelihood. Firing people is the worst, but like any business owner, I have to do this sometimes, and dragging it out is counterproductive. There isn't enough room in a small business for negativity. 

​So that's the bad. I suppose it's a reality of growth, of getting a new office dialed, of believing things I should have questioned. But that's part of life, too. Mistakes breed growth, even if it stings. I'm resilient. I can handle it so my team doesn't have to. Fuck, I'm tired.

JP and Iris

Amanda

"Then why do it?" 
I've asked myself this question so many times.

Because, like Lizelle Van Vuuren, CEO of WomenWhoStartUp.com told me a few days ago, "You don't choose entrepreneurship. It's not something you go out and one day decide to do; it chooses you." 

It's true.
​
I see a better way for creative work to get done with humanity as the main KPI.

I see a better future for the outdoor world that STARTS with photography and writing and UX design and someday ends with an outdoor industry that truly is for everyone.
​
I see partnerships that help our planet instead of put more trash into it.

I can't unsee these things, so I can't go work for someone else.
​
I just can't. 
​
That's the way it is, regardless of whether I'm reluctant or stoked, so I better at least carry myself with humor, humility, and empathy grounded in perspective. This is the messy grace that defines my general demeanor anyway.

​Most days.

People are noticing. Clients, prospects, fans, partners are noticing. I'm getting asked to speak a lot lately, about women in business, the power of play, and how to handle conflict. Brands like Camber Outdoors, Roam Events, and SheVentures have provided incredible platforms for partnership and collaboration. Industry friends are coming out of the woodwork, and our little, creative tribe is growing. Our work is backed by passion and meaning, and our voices are getting louder. This is the good. This would not have been possible without taking a risk on integrating into Denver and just going for it. This is bigger than my petty employer problems.

​This is work we do for women everywhere, in the now and the future, and I'm incredibly proud to take a stance and crew up with other people who believe in our mission to elevate women in business, adventure, and society in general.

This does not mean deflating men, by the way. Amplifying women is not a mutually exclusive relationship with men. I love men. Men are awesome. That's an important message in our conversations, too. 

Speaking at SheVentures in Denver last month during Outdoor Retailer

That leaves the reality. 

Acknowledging your reality and your truth takes perspective, and perspective is difficult to find when you're going hard all the time. 

There's no guide for business. There's no giant handbook that is going to tell me what to do in every insane situation I end up in almost every day. But there are mentors and friends and partners who are more than happy to sit down and hash shit out. And there is snowboarding. Thank god for snowboarding. And dogs. And coffee.

I believe in physical exertion every single day, whether it's lifting weights to failure, running until your lungs hurt, or scaring yourself with velocity and a mountain. 

And I believe in laughter. We take ourselves too seriously. It's just life. Find fun every single day because otherwise, what's the point?

I've obliterated every new business goal I've set for myself in the past two months, and the work is fun. We're hiring (slowly). And my truly great employees get greater every day. They're amazing humans and creatives. I'm lucky to have them. 

And I'm sitting here missing a powder day. So that's the reality.

Out of here- see you on the mountain.
XOXO